


Chocolate

by astolenchariot



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Office, Eventual Romance, M/M, Possible Character Death, office!AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-02
Updated: 2019-09-10
Packaged: 2020-10-05 13:00:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,848
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20489291
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/astolenchariot/pseuds/astolenchariot
Summary: Kihyun decided to die. Wonho decided to tell Kihyun how he feels.





	1. I.

Today’s the day I decided to die.

I started the day as normally as possible. I woke up early and decided to, for once, fix my bed. Whenever mom visited the apartment, she would always nag me about my messy bed. I’m a 24 year old, single man. I live alone. I barely have anyone to come over, let alone sleep with in my bed. _ What’s the point of fixing something you know you’d mess up eventually? _ It’s a waste of time and energy. But today is different, I wanted my room to be tidy when mom visits once she gets the news. Once my body is found. I want that to be the last time I disappoint her.

I also ate breakfast today. And I cooked! Well, tried to. I burnt the toast. And the eggs. But at least the bacon was good. Or edible, at least. So I ordered for delivery instead and, for the first time, smiled and greeted the delivery guy when he arrived. He was smiling widely as he handed me the food, but his eyes were tired. Sad, even. And it makes me wonder, what is he holding onto? What helps him put on that friendly face if he is just as miserable as I am? I want to know. Maybe it’ll help me find a reason as well. I almost asked him, but before I could even form any sentence in mind, I was already paying up and the man left as fast as he could. 

Chinese food is a great breakfast, I realized. I should’ve done it more when I still had the time.

I then headed to work and everything was normal. I sat in front of the computer all day as usual, talking to people I don’t know complaining about their phone signal. They cussed at me again today—called me an idiot and a good for nothing bastard, things I already knew long ago. I didn’t curse at them today, though, much to my supervisor’s approval. _ Continue doing this, Kihyun, and you’ll eventually contribute better to the team. _

It was fairly a normal day. I got texts from my mother in the afternoon asking me how I was doing, telling me that she’ll visit this coming weekend to check up on me. _ Make sure your bed’s tidy, _she said. I replied with a simple okay, followed by another message promising that I will fix my bed. It’s the only thing I can fix at this point.

By the time my shift ended, I rushed out and got to my locker, taking everything I had inside and putting them in my bag. I didn’t want to leave anything in this place. I was busy trying to fit everything in my bag, contemplating what I should bring home and what I should throw, when someone nudged my shoulder.

“Hey, I was asking if you need help,” the man asked. I turned my head up to see it was Wonho, smiling goofily down at me. “You look so distracted, I’ve been trying to get your attention for like, five minutes.”

I just stared blankly at him, wondering why he wanted to talk to me all of a sudden. We’ve been workmates for a long time, but we’re not friends. Well, he tried to befriend me before, I think, but I wasn’t interested. “Sorry—Just have a lot of things in my mind,” I managed to answer.

“Things like?” He leaned against the lockers, arms crossed.

_ The fuck does he want? _

“Things that are none of your business?” I deadpanned. This made him laugh, for some reason, nudging my shoulder again. _ One more and I’ll sock him. _

“Come on, don’t be too serious,’ he said, the annoying grin still visible on his face. Wonho then took the bag from my hold. I tried to take it back, but his grip was too strong. “I’m in the mood for coffee. Come with me.” And just like that, he went off with my bag. I had no choice but to follow, all of my valuables were in there. 

“Can I have my bag, please,” I tried to ask for it, but his longer legs strode and it was hard for me to even reach for my belongings. It also didn’t help that he greeted almost everyone that he came across, smiling warmly at them and making small talk. _ How can he have so many friends? _

Before I knew it, I was already inside the cafe with him. The line was long, and the whole room was filled with indistinct chatters from its patrons. I looked around and observed some of them. They seemed to be happy. They were laughing and talking while sipping their overpriced coffee.The thoughts were starting to flood my mind again until someone started poking my cheek. “What do you want.”

“That’s what I’m asking,” Wonho mumbled, his finger still on my cheek before I pushed it away. “You’re spacing out again.”

I could feel my face heat up, who knows how long we’ve been standing in front of the counter? I swear I could feel the other people in line glaring at me. “Americano. Venti,” I answered simply before leaving the line. The stares were getting too overwhelming and I had to go somewhere private, somewhere hidden. Conveniently enough, there was a vacant table in one of the corners of the establishment which I immediately occupied, sinking down on the velvet couch, wanting it to just swallow my existence. 

And there he was, walking around the cafe with the tray in his hand, his lips pouted as if he were an oversized puppy looking for his owner. I would’ve called his attention but I didn’t want any more attention to myself. It took him a good five minutes to find me, and as soon as he did, the pout on his lips was replaced by a wide grin. He makes his way to where I was seated, taking the space across me while he put everything on the table. 

“I thought you ditched me,” he said. And to be honest, I was internally hitting myself for not doing so. “You just suddenly ran off. What’s the matter?”

“This,” I answered with a stern voice, still slumped down on the couch. “Too many people.”

I let out a small groan and sat up, frowning as I grab my drink from the man in front of me. I took a sip, and as much as I didn’t want to, the bitter and pungent liquid that slid down my throat helped me relax a bit, my brows unfurling and the frown on my lips turning into a flat line instead. “How do you even last a minute in this place?” I asked Wonho. “It’s too.. crowded. Too noisy. Like people are always watching you.”

“I don’t mind crowded places,” Wonho shrugged as he started drinking as well. “I like it, actually. Quiet places scare me.”

“Is that why you’re always so annoyingly noisy?”

“Ouch,” he said, obviously faking a frown while he held onto his chest dramatically. “But hey, at least now I know you’re noticing me!” 

My brows met again and I tilted my head in confusion. “What do you mean?”

“I’ve always wanted to get your attention,” he mumbled, his face turning red for some reason. “But enough of that, why did you pack everything up from your locker? Resigning?”

For a moment, I didn’t know what to answer. I just shrugged instead, busying myself with my drink. 

“Your boss is annoying. I was a part of his team when I started working there, good thing I was assigned to a different department,” he continued to babble, occasionally filling his mouth with the chocolate cake that he ordered. _ Chocolate cake and a chocolate frappucino? What? Is he a seven year old? _

I kept the thoughts to myself and nodded in agreement. “He’s the bane of my existence. But at least I won’t be seeing him starting tomorrow,” I slipped. And I wanted to slap myself in annoyance.

“Tomorrow? You’ll be leaving tomorrow?”

I shrugged yet again and grabbed the small fork from Wonho, taking a mouthful of the treat. My face grimaced at how sweet it was, making me wonder even more how the grown man in front of me managed to consume it like it was nothing.

“Hey, you’re leaving tomorrow?” Wonho continued to ask, the pout resurfacing on his lips. “No fair! We just started talking.” 

“Please don’t get the wrong impression that we’re friends.”

This made him pause for a good minute, his gaze set directly at me as though he was trying to absorb what I just said. I knew it was a little harsh, but I didn’t want to give the man false hopes. I couldn’t be making friends at this point. Wonho takes one last sip from his drink before he got up, wordlessly taking his stuff before heading out of the cafe.

I let out a small sigh and contemplated if I should follow him or not and before I knew it, I had my bag hanging on my shoulder, sauntering out of the crowded cafe while calling out Wonho’s name.


	2. II.

It’s the middle of November. The wind is chilly and there’s not a lot of people around the banks of the river. It’s weird, I have to admit. People are usually gathered here at this time of the year. Not that I’m complaining, though, I still don’t like crowded places. But seeing a usually joyous area in this state is quite depressing, I’m not gonna lie. It feels empty. Or rather, it reminds me of the emptiness inside me.

I sit on one of the benches facing the river. It’s calm. Quiet; making it even more mysterious and quite creepy. If things didn’t happen the way they did five years ago, my body would’ve been in the deepest parts of this body of water. Or I could be buried somewhere else. Maybe they would have been able to find my body. But the thought of staying underneath, swallowed by the water’s current, was quite enticing. I want to believe that if I did what I did, no one would be able to find me.

But here I am, sitting alone in front of the place that could have been where I’m resting. Ironically enough, I’m feeling quite restless. I have an appointment in fifteen minutes, but visiting this river again seemed to be a good idea. I check my phone and see multiple messages from him, telling me that his meeting is taking longer than expected and that he’ll be late for a few minutes. Quite convenient, I think to myself.

I give the length of the river another glance before getting up, taking a deep breath before heading back to the car. A small sigh of relief escapes my lips as soon as the warmth of the vehicle finally envelopes my freezing stature. I rub my hands for a little more heat before revving the engine up, plugging the aux cable to my phone right before I start driving.

_ Break the news: you’re walking out to be a good man for someone else. Sorry I was never good like you. _

Lorde’s voice fills up the small car as Writer in the Dark starts to play. I sing along, knowing every word of it. 

_ I am my mother’s child, I’ll love you ‘til my breathing stops. I’ll love you ‘til you call the cops on me.  _

That line always gets me. I can feel my throat starting to tighten, tears already forming in the corner of my eyes as the popstar continues to sing the somber melody. I then decide to play a different song, a light pop track now reverberating around the vehicle, the overwhelming feelings eventually starting to fade away.

I reach the restaurant just before the song ended. I get out of the car and I hand the valet my keys. I make sure my shirt is clean and free from any excessive wrinkling before getting inside the establishment, asking the front of the house for the table that my friend had reserved. Someone then leads me to a vacant table on the other side of the room. I take a seat on the velvet couch and look up at the waiter when he offered me something to drink or eat while I wait.

I check my phone to find no message from him, indicating that it’ll take him quite some time to get here. I pull off a smile as I move my attention back at the waiter, asking for a glass of water and a small slice of chocolate cake. I have been craving for it for a couple of days now, and it’ll be a nice way to distract myself from the fact that I’m still alone for now.

The waiter leaves after confirming my order. I look around the unfamiliar place, trying to get myself accustomed to the new environment. The restaurant is dimly lit, only a few yellow bulbs hanging from the ceiling is lighting the place up, together with the faintly scented candles on each table. It’s romantic, I suppose. There are not a lot of people inside, only three tables are occupied including the one I’m sitting on. The other two are taken by couples, all of them smiling widely as they talked with their hushed voices over their dinner. They look happy. And for some reason, that makes me happy as well.

My train of thoughts are cut short when the waiter comes back with the small plate that held my early dessert. The cake looks good, almost too good that I am questioning myself if I should ruin such a piece of art with my fork. But I do. My craving for the sweet treat is much stronger than my desire to preserve its beauty. 

“Kihyun!” A voice suddenly stops me. “Chocolate cake before dinner? Really? What are you, a seven year old?”

I roll my eyes and shove the cake into my mouth, closing my eyes in content as I finally taste it. I look up at the man as he sits down in front of me, glaring at him. “I would’ve waited for dessert if you didn’t take so long, Wonho.”

He takes my fork and he starts to eat as well, the same annoying grin still visible on his face. I haven’t seen it in a while, but it still brings me the same kind of comfort, the same kind of reassurance. “Sorry. My meeting just ended,” he explains. “But I drove here as fast as I could! Almost got chased by a police officer, actually.”

I watch him enjoy the treat, not even bothering to remind me that the cake is mine and I’m the one who ordered it. He still likes his sweets, I see. “How have you been? I haven’t seen you in a while.”

“Me?” Wonho asks, his brows raised with his mouth full of the dessert.  _ This man is past 30 but he still looks like a child.  _ “I’m okay. Stressed. But I’m getting by. You?”

“We’re all stressed, I see,” I say before snatching the fork from him. I take another small piece and pushes it into my mouth. “My publisher is nagging me about a deadline. In a week’s time, actually. I’m three chapters behind.”

“That doesn’t sound so good.”

“It really isn’t,” I answer with a sigh, eating the remainder of the cake. “She’ll drop me and my book if I don’t get my shit straight.”

“You need to take a vacation, man,” he says while he leans back against his chair, making it easier for me to observe his frame. He’s gotten thinner, a lot less buff than how he used to be before. “Let’s go to the beach next week? I’m dying for a break as well.”

He grins widely at his own proposition, and it makes me smile just as wide. The idea of being with him alone for a few days is definitely enticing. “Yeah? How about your wife? You know we don’t get along too well.”

Wonho presses his lips into a flat line, sighing softly as soon as I mention his wife. “She won’t be here next week anyway. Some.. business trip somewhere in Europe, I think.”

“So that’s why you asked me for dinner? To replace her while she’s away?”

We both fall silent after what I said. Neither of us know what to say because we both know it’s the truth. The close friendship that we used to have five years ago are already replaced by the eventual secret rendezvous. We both want it, but none of us want to admit how wrong it is.

I eventually break the silence by calling the waiter, asking him for the bill. I let him leave first before looking at Wonho again, his face still pale and stoic at what had just happened. “I’ll get my bags ready, I’ll see you next week.”

  
  



End file.
